Small Fist in The Clouds

I wanted to talk about my son. I wanted to thank God for all that he has been doing in his life. He is such a blessing to me and my family. He has wisdom that shows up in ways that causes us to pause and really listen to him.  These glimpses of maturity in him is my "small fist in the clouds", and lets me know that the showers of blessings are on the way.  No, not material things.  Blessings that are beyond measure. He is blessed in the city and in the fields. He will be blessed as a young man. He is blessed as a husband.  He is blessed as a father. He is blessed as a Priest. He is blessed.

He leaves for a week with his biological father on Wednesday.  I will miss him. I will miss our Mommy and Rori dates. I will miss him just being in the house.  But I trust God to keep him. I believe that this trip is a gift from God, every good and perfect gift after all is from God after all.

Greater is He that is in me...

OUR GOD IS GREATER

“Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome in power
Our God, Our God… “

The words of this song by Chris Tomlin lift my spirit tonight.  I need all the encouragement I can get to stand up to this trial.  Truth be told, I just want to curl myself into the tiniest ball and cry until God sends in the cavalry. But He does not like that plan of mine.  I wonder why?   Because I am a soldier in God’s army and I will fight for right and the salvation of my family, friends and foes.

I cried today.  Big, loud sobs rose from my belly and out my mouth.  I hurt so much for him – my nephew.  To me he is my son and I wonder where did we fail him?  How could this be the reality?  Why has he gone astray? Why has he departed from the training?  I want to hold him to me. I don’t want to let go. But as the tears seemed endless, the voice of God said “Let him go”.  Even now, I don’t know how to do that. I have said it to his mom. Told her Let him go, there is nothing we can do for him now.  But now when I am the one hearing it from the Master Himself, I shudder and groan in my spirit.

When you have a child, you never think of the bad that could happen. Your pictures of their future never include a harshness that will swallow them or even get near them.  We are their protectors and we believe that will be enough. But alas, we deceive ourselves.  It’s not enough, and the boogie man gets into our home. He seeks to steal, kill and destroy.  He looks for the young and he preys on their weaknesses.  He capitalizes on their vulnerability, their frailness; and while we are staring with unseeing eyes he takes them. 

God help us through this. Secrets and lies are the bondage keeper.  My family, my nephew, my cousin, my aunt, my brother, my sister, myself…held in bondage of secrets.  Shhhh. Don’t say anything is all you hear. No-one talks about what happened. We hide behind masks that crumble with each passing year.  We can’t keep this up.  The unraveling continues generation after generation.  Why does he do what he does?  He has traded the truth for a lie.  I read the book Bondage Breaker and the author says, truth is the liberating agent.  The bible says, the truth shall set you free.

So, I am standing on that word.  I am forcing my lips to speak the truth over my family.  I am forcing my mind to think the truth.  I am in Christ.  I am trusting in my God that is Greater than he that is in the world!

INTERNATIONAL TEEN TALENT

This is my very first time in Cleveland TN. USA.  I must say it has been an experience. Just to say that the people I have met are all so very nice to me.  I was not sure of the reception I would receive, but was pleased.  I  am here with the Abundant Life COG youth drama team that my son and sisters are all apart of.  Without bias, i can say that the team presented very well.  I am not sure of the final outcome, but they have already won for me.  They gave their all on Friday morning.  No holding back.

I have seen so many talented teens; creativity; excellent performances without a question.  But they were few who really ministered.  Some were well rehearsed, but they lacked heart.  There was no passion, despite great skills.  Oh how i wish that all would have been focused on Christ.

Somewhere along the way, our focus becomes centered on a miniature trophy and a few minutes of applause and gaiety.  Somewhere we forgot the message of this Jesus we claim to be followers of and have sidestepped His purpose for our own.

Jesus help us...we walk in flesh and not spirit.

I do not intend to cast a shadow over this at all.  I think the idea is a great one. I believe that this will allow our young people to find talents they never knew existed; to explore possibilities beyond the scope of their own thinking; to tap into the promises and purpose that to them is God given; to use their talents for His glory.  Yes, I am a supporter of show casing our teens, celebrating their accomplishments and rewarding them for hard work.

But somehow, we need to find the balance, where it is the perfect waltz of worshiping God, telling His son's gospel in varied forms, simultaneously giving to Caesar what is due to him. What say you?