Why God?
Why choose God?
Why live for God?
Why God?
This was the question posed to us yesterday morning, the
very last day of September. It was one
that I focused on throughout the day and caused me to reflect over my
life. I turned 40 this September and I
had a lot more events to reflect upon than I did at 20.
At 20, I was young and ready to embark upon an exciting
life. I was promised marriage by my son’s dad. I was promised his love. I was promised the fairy tale ending of happily
ever after. That didn’t materialize for
me. As a matter of fact, the promises
were rescinded and another person took my place. I say this not to put anyone on blast, but to
answer the question of “Why God?”
It took seven long years to get to a place where I could
stand up, and feel good about myself again.
It took God pouring healing oil into my wounds that would fester and
sore and gush with anger, un-forgiveness, bitterness, blame and sorrow. It took God to hold me up when I wanted to
curl myself into a ball and die. It took
God to whisper his very own sweet words of love into my heart, so I could
heal. Why God? I learnt that he never
leaves you. He never tosses you aside
for another. I will never leave you nor
forsake you says the Lord.
At 30, I was the Mom of a 10 year old. He was feeling the sting of his father’s absenteeism
and I was feeling the guilt of not being enough for him. I was looking for approval and a Dad for my
son, and found instead more empty promises from the mouth of men. I ended up in a relationship that was one
sided. I wanted the forever after and he
wanted someone to use. So I was the help
mate without the covenant of marriage, until I was once again replaced by
another. Why God? I learnt that as much as I was never going to
be enough for my son or any other person, God was the more than enough that I
needed. His grace was sufficient. His
riches was more than enough. My grace is sufficient for you says the Lord.
At 40, I am the woman that stands in the wonderful presence
of a God who is mighty and tender all at once.
He is my love and my all in all. He is the fulfillment of promises made
over the last two decades. He keeps his word.
His covenant of love remains over us.
Why God? He never fails.
Amen re God never failing etc. Good read - your spiritual growth/walk continues :-)
ReplyDeleteOur message on Sunday was, "Who is he?". Jesus asked his disciples, "Who do they say I am?" and "Who do you say I am?" At one point the guest pastor turned the question on us the congregants, He said, "if someone asked your friend, church sis or bro, coworker etc. Who is "Jodi", "Mary", "Bob".... what would they say? Would christian be in the description, would it be favorable, would your christian walk/supposed walk be a part of who you are?
So true. That has now made me think of what would others say about me. Most importantly, who am I when I am among those closest to me. Am I authentic in my Christian walk? Hmmmm food for thought Jo.
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